Week In Review

Week in Review: Indians Clinch, Cody Parkey Still Employed and Goodnight Sweet Joshua

Indians: The Indians clinched the central division with a win over Detroit on Monday. It is the happiest I have been since Johnny went poof.
I am incredibly worried about our pitching staff, Kluber should be ready to go for the ALDS but after him I worry. If Bauer is on, he’s just as good as any other #1 out there. Problem has obviously been consistency for him, but he will at least battle and should give you a quality start even when he is off. Tomlin is a crapshoot and after that I honestly do not know what we are going to do. Someone needs to fill the 4th spot and then basically everyone needs to pitch on short rest.

I’ve said it before, I am available if Tito needs me, but my phone hasn’t rang yet. I trust Terry Francona with my life, but I think he is unaware of what an overweight, sweaty italian guy with thinning hair could bring to the rotation. Let me chuck a few 83 mph greaseballs in there for four innings and royally fuck up everyone’s timing. I don’t see how it could go wrong.

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Browns: Cody Parkey still has a job. How is that possible? Long run, it is probably a good thing because it helps our draft stock, but what kind of message does that send to your locker room? Just trotting out a dude who missed three field goals and a game winner the very next week? Parkey should’ve been left in Miami, he probably wouldn’t have minded anyways. If you’re gonna send parkey out there, you might as well send me out there. I’ve been known to do a little sports from time to time and I am confident I can hit 3-6 if given the chance…

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Headline of the Week:

Josh Gordon of Cleveland Browns Entering Rehab – ESPN.com… A lot of people saying that Josh Gordon would rather enter rehab than play for the Browns. I can’t say that isn’t entirely true. But that’s not the real story here. What people don’t know is that Josh Gordon’s paternity test results came in yesterday and…

I am no longer mad at Josh Gordon. I wake up everyday and pray I get hit by a car so I don’t have to go to work. If I was told I have a child, I’d probably enter rehab too. I will miss Josh Gordon and it is likely he will never return to Cleveland, but we can’t say it hasn’t been a fun ride.

 

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By The Numbers: The Indians went 1-3 this week but none of it matters because we clinched. 1 is the only number we should be worried about because that’s how many pitchers we have. The Browns are 0-1 this week (again, 0-3 overall) 1 is another key number as it is the amount of star wideouts headed to rehab. I lost 2 pounds this week #veggiesovereverything. Indians runs – 10 Browns Points – 24, much better.

Thanks again for another great week folks, keep reading and share with your friends! EAOD

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